I had a client ask me that recently. Her exact words were:

“You’re always calm. Or is that just you in coaching sessions because I’m a client?”

Fair question. Because the truth is, that wasn’t always me.

Earlier in my career, calm wasn’t something I’d associate with how I showed up.

I was reactive. Frustrated easily. Carried stress from one conversation into the next.

And like most people in recruitment, I probably thought the answer was more professional development.

Better scripts. Better structure. Better training.

That helps. But it’s not the full picture. Where the real shift came from the biggest changes in how I show up didn’t come from anything work-related.

They came from personal development. Things that had nothing to do with recruitment.

For me, one of the biggest turning points was doing a few Ayahuasca ceremonies a few years ago.

Not something I ever expected to do. And not something I’m saying everyone should go out and try. But for me, it was genuinely one of the most impactful experiences I’ve had.

It gave me a level of clarity and calm I hadn’t experienced before. Not just in life, but in how I approached work. Less reactive. More present. More considered in how I think and respond.

And that carries into everything.

Why this actually matters for recruitment.

This isn’t about Ayahuasca. It’s about something bigger.

How you show up day to day is not driven by your job.

It’s driven by you.

Your thinking. Your emotional state. Your ability to handle pressure.

And in recruitment, that shows up everywhere.

• How you handle objections

• How you run meetings

• How you deal with setbacks

• How consistent you are day to day

You can have the best process in the world.

But if you’re reactive, inconsistent, or easily thrown off, it limits how effective that process actually is.

The two are connected whether we like it or not

One thing I’ve realised over time is that there isn’t really a separation between “work life” and “personal life”.

They’re the same thing.

If things aren’t right outside of work, it shows up in work.

If you’re not developing yourself outside of recruitment, it limits how far you can go within it.

That’s why whenever I’m interviewing people to join our business, I always ask about personal development.

Not just courses or training. But what they’ve done to work on themselves. Because it has a direct impact on how they perform.

How they think. How they handle pressure. How they show up with clients and candidates.

And ultimately, how consistent they are.

You can’t separate the two. What this looks like in practice doesn’t mean you need to go and do anything extreme.

For most people, it’s much simpler.

• Taking time to reflect

• Being more intentional with how you respond to situations

• Working on your mindset, not just your skillset

• Actually paying attention to how you handle pressure and setbacks

That’s where the real gains are.

Because the more stable and clear you are, the better you operate. And that’s what people feel when they work with you.

Final thought

That question stuck with me.

“Are you always this calm?”

The answer is yes.

But it’s not something that just happens. It’s something that’s been built over time. And most of that work had nothing to do with recruitment. But it’s had a massive impact on how I show up within it.